Unlock the Mystery of Women

A friend sent me an email forward one day. The forward was a joke about women and how impossible it was to understand them. I joked back that it wasn’t really that big of a mystery that women merely wanted to be loved more than humanly possible and want to feel that their man loves them more than any man has ever loved a woman. Well of course that’s not really true but I know that is how it can feel for men.

At the same time it wasn’t far from the truth either. It isn’t really that women want men to love them more than is humanly possible but women want to feel loved. This sounds simple enough and basically it is but as simple as it is it’s very complicated. The trouble is everyone has different love needs. Men don’t know what a woman’s love needs are offhand. He has to learn them…the hard way. It’s impossible to just know because every person is different.

Women let men know when they feel their love needs aren’t being met where as men are more likely to suffer in silence. The trouble is that men don’t really understand that that is what women are doing and so they are confused and just feel like they can’t understand her nor can they please her.

So men, if your girl is giving you the silent treatment or crying or telling you that nothing is wrong when its obvious she is very upset you can bank on the fact that you’ve left some love need unmet or in some way made her feel unloved. That’s not to say that you did anything terrible or even that you did anything wrong. It’s just to say that she feels her needs are unmet and this makes her feel very distressed. Now this could be as simple as forgetting to walk the dog. For her she might feel loved when you remember to carry out your obligations. Or it could be something more serious. Knowing this men you are now armed to combat this. You forgot to walk the dog? She’s giving you the silent treatment? It’s probably time to apologize for forgetting to walk the dog and remind her that you love her. Let her know in some way that your obligations to her or to your lives are important to you too. Yes I know it is a lot of work and it means you have to sit down and think about things but isn’t a happy relationship worth the work? As a matter of fact the only way you can have a happy relationship is to do that kind of work!

Now for some woman you can never ever please them and that is usually a control method. If that is your situation then you have far bigger troubles! It’s hard to work out situations where one person loves control so much that they are willing to slowly tear apart their relationship in the name of it. But we are not talking about those women today. Today we are just talking about the average women and her mystique or her not so mysterious ways.

Now women this doesn’t mean you are off the hook either!! No, far from it! As women we need to be mindful of the fact that not everything he does or doesn’t do is a reflection of his feelings for us. If he is doing most of the stuff he should be doing and he is treating you well and most of the time making you feel loved then the odds are when he messes up it really isn’t about you! You need to cut him some slack! Stop and appreciate what he is doing! What's more remember we all get to mess up sometimes. Look at the whole picture before you give him that womanly attitude. Better yet, don’t give him the attitude! Tell him how you feel! Stop and think and put your feelings into words. Write it down if you have to but get those feelings out and talk about them. Once you do you might be surprised at his reaction!